...

Fuck.
Yeah, it's been pretty much impossible for me to exist as a person since last January. I had to help someone move in with me, my job started demanding more of me, my pain disorder kicked up - and now my friend's moving out, I'm job hunting, and my body still hurts. In a few days, it'll feel like I'm back where I started just a few years ago when I moved home. Sigh.
I've gone back to therapy, upped my meds a bit. I dropped learning Chinese, too, since my mental health's been so bad I've just needed to focus on not going crazy. Losing your entire schedule and way of life to a mistake you didn't make is really quite the worst. I've only just gotten a possible job prospect today - somewhere that actually seemed to want to hire me - so it's been a bit hard to be motivated, too.

Little else has really changed, but I've lost a lot of my creative will and wants. Hopefully forcing myself to write another little blog post after awhile will help me get back to it, but it still sucks feeling the way I have. I think I only made 3-4 Thanatobizzares last year, it's really been miserable. I haven't been able to like... barf the feelings out of me onto a FireAlpaca page - I just haven't had the energy.
All I can hope for is that something will change sooner rather than later, I guess.

☣ Feeling: Lost in the sauce.